It really is the exclamation point that makes all the difference. We have had exciting adventures! in the last 48 hours. Here is a short list of the exciting! things that we have done so far:
There was this weird Jesus picture on the side of the road in Alabama just north of Mobile. What is most disturbing! is that the thing behind the display is a soccer goal. And the fact that it's just plain disturbing. Connor dubbed this
Emo Jesus.
There were petrified logs! We learned about erosion. Notice how thrilled the children are to be learning about erosion!
We thought that the petrified log! in this picture (not the tree that's still alive and just standing there like it's trying to make a point) looked a bit like a fish.
There were deer! on the side of the road. I was driving and didn't get a picture of so who really knows, I could totally be lying. There was also cherry vanilla ice cream!
There was a swimming pool! at the airport Holiday Inn in Southaven MS. There were also chicken nuggets!
Because we are classy we only choose the best. God bless TripAdvisor!
There was a monorail! at Mud Island. Surprisingly inexpensive and way more fun than the name would imply.
There was a trip to Target! for batteries.
And then, there was Doris. Doris is a Garmin Streetpilot and she spent the day getting us lost in Arkansas. Now let me be the first to say that I really love this thing, and yesterday she worked like a champ. Today however, I considered chucking her down the side of a mountain, but reconsidered because I couldn't get back to wherever I had come from without her.
Doris likes to take crazy turns and never tells you the appropriate exit to take when there are many to choose from. Doris says, "Turn left in .4 miles" but there are 37 different exits all in the same area and she's just telling you to turn left. So you do, and of course, it's the wrong left. So you have to loop-de-loo around and find the real left you were supposed to take.
Connor decided that Doris has an affinity for exit ramps. Then there is The Road That Does Not Exist where Doris says, "Turn left" and you really WANT to turn left, but there is only the shoulder of the road or some trees. No road. And you think, "well, maybe this thing knows something that I don't," so you consider turning left just for a moment and then you contemplate throwing it out the window.
Then you call the place where you're supposed to be going and you say, "Doris is on the fritz. Please tell me where you are in relation to me. I am located at 34.587153, -94.124811." This just makes you sound like a crazy person. They don't want to tell you how to find them, especially when the person on the other line can clearly hear children wailing in the background about being lost and screaming at you to please not throw Doris out the window.
The nice person on the other end of the phone says, "I'm at shhhhhhhh-two-shhhhhhhh," and then you loose cell service.
So you drive some more and call back. By this time the children are hysterical and you can't hear what the very patient person on the other end of the phone is saying. You threaten to throw
them out the window. Then you remember that you are having fun!
It really is the exclamation point that makes all the difference. We have had exciting adventures! in the last 48 hours. Here is a short list of the exciting! things that we have done so far:
There was this weird Jesus picture on the side of the road in Alabama just north of Mobile. What is most disturbing! is that the thing behind the display is a soccer goal. And the fact that it's just plain disturbing. Connor dubbed this Emo Jesus.
There were petrified logs! We learned about erosion. Notice how thrilled the children are to be learning about erosion!
We thought that the petrified log! in this picture (not the tree that's still alive and just standing there like it's trying to make a point) looked a bit like a fish.
There were deer! on the side of the road. I was driving and didn't get a picture of so who really knows, I could totally be lying. There was also cherry vanilla ice cream!
There was a swimming pool! at the airport Holiday Inn in Southaven MS. There were also chicken nuggets!
Because we are classy we only choose the best. God bless TripAdvisor!
There was a monorail! at Mud Island. Surprisingly inexpensive and way more fun than the name would imply.
There was a trip to Target! for batteries.
And then, there was Doris. Doris is a Garmin Streetpilot and she spent the day getting us lost in Arkansas. Now let me be the first to say that I really love this thing, and yesterday she worked like a champ. Today however, I considered chucking her down the side of a mountain, but reconsidered because I couldn't get back to wherever I had come from without her.
Doris likes to take crazy turns and never tells you the appropriate exit to take when there are many to choose from. Doris says, "Turn left in .4 miles" but there are 37 different exits all in the same area and she's just telling you to turn left. So you do, and of course, it's the wrong left. So you have to loop-de-loo around and find the real left you were supposed to take.
Connor decided that Doris has an affinity for exit ramps. Then there is The Road That Does Not Exist where Doris says, "Turn left" and you really WANT to turn left, but there is only the shoulder of the road or some trees. No road. And you think, "well, maybe this thing knows something that I don't," so you consider turning left just for a moment and then you contemplate throwing it out the window.
Then you call the place where you're supposed to be going and you say, "Doris is on the fritz. Please tell me where you are in relation to me. I am located at 34.587153, -94.124811." This just makes you sound like a crazy person. They don't want to tell you how to find them, especially when the person on the other line can clearly hear children wailing in the background about being lost and screaming at you to please not throw Doris out the window.
The nice person on the other end of the phone says, "I'm at shhhhhhhh-two-shhhhhhhh," and then you loose cell service.
So you drive some more and call back. By this time the children are hysterical and you can't hear what the very patient person on the other end of the phone is saying. You threaten to throw them out the window. Then you remember that you are having fun!
6 comments:
LOVE IT! Thank you for beginning your trip log with Emo Jesus. And the call for help whilst threatening Doris is hilarious. We are enjoying your pix.
Have fun and be safe! xoxo for the kids!
How exciting!!! Remind me not to do that.
Good luck from the "Burts That Stay Put"
So where in America are 80% of the H-n-R branch of the Burt clan? That give me and idea for an open-source Carmen Sandiego clone! Instead of a desk encyclopedia, you're given clues to Wikipedia articles.
The vacation will be blogged...
Great stuff, hon! Thanks for sharing, and thanks to James for the idea!
Pan is very excited about taking part
in your adventure via blog...he would
like to see pictures of Native
American places if you encounter any.
Hook is not as interested...just wants to know if your "robot guide"
can speak in nautical terms...not for
any reason...just asking.
Tell Pan that we are going to see Native American stuff tomorrow and I will send pictures. Tell Hook, no, not as far as I can tell. If I drive into a pond, I might know more.
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